Psychotherapy – “Talk Therapy”
Talk therapy allows one to talk out loud in sharing our thoughts and feelings with a witness (the therapist). Effective psychotherapy helps us gain a more compassionate sense of self and helps us quiet that critical voice in our heads telling us “we are not good enough”. This critical voice is “installed” in our self-concept typically as a result of bad information learned in childhood resulting in faulty beliefs.
Consistent negative thinking stemming from faulty beliefs and total lack of confidence can make us feel stuck. Feeling as if we are living in a rut leads us to feel overwhelmed, stressed, angry, and depressed. Feeling stuck is unhealthy distorted thinking and can be changed by practicing Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). Learning CBT skills helps us gain better awareness of ourselves as an integrated being of body, mind, and spirit! With this awareness we understand that a holistic approach to a treatment plan of recovery is essential to be sustainable.
I specialize in exploring these faulty beliefs that are at the core of our self-esteem. We need encouragement from a non-judgmental person to help challenge our negative thinking and poor assessment of ourselves. The benefits of evaluating these beliefs and having them reframed more to the truth will have a significant positive impact in our lives’.
When we are successful in raising our low self-esteem, we can be more assertive in getting our needs met. This helps improve our interpersonal communication, achieve a more contented life, and allows us to be more loving to ourselves and to others.
Regarding our love relationships, solving “love problems” is not easy because it requires a realistic assessment of self and an understanding of how we impact others and how others impact us. Our first challenge in couples work is coming to an understanding that we both have an equal 50/50 contribution to the state of the relationship. Learning and applying effective communication techniques and setting healthy boundaries can have a huge positive impact in our relationships.
In couples counseling we learn new communication skills and traits that support healthy relationships. When couples can experience some early success and effectively begin to shift to a healthy dynamic between them, they tend to extend and deepen their commitment to their’ couples counseling. I’ve witnessed this.
With the investment in time to enhance understanding of their dynamic, past and present, they become empowered to explore some of their core difficulties safe from retribution. With awareness and better understanding each individual can reframe some of their unhealthy and distorted thoughts/views to develop a more caring and positive dynamic. They can better appreciate and understand the fears of each other and together identify ways to comfort the other when one or the other is struggling.
Other challenges involve grief over loss. Loss can be defined as loss due to death of a loved one, or a pet, or a home and living situation. Grief may strike with news of a loved one diagnosed with a serious illness. We may need support in grieving a financial setback, loss of a job, or a break up from a love relationship. We need to seek relief and process our unfortunate losses and get help from someone that can listen to our anger and sit with our grief. We need help in changing our unhealthy thinking and perspective by being taught healthy coping skills and the practice of mindfulness once we process some our anger and discontent.